


Afterlife

by sterekwolfstar



Category: Star Wars Legends: Last of The Jedi Series - Jude Watson
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-20
Updated: 2018-09-20
Packaged: 2019-07-14 18:14:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16045892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sterekwolfstar/pseuds/sterekwolfstar
Summary: Ferus is reunited with his love and his friends in the afterlife





	Afterlife

Roan brushed Ferus’s hair back gently out of his face as he waited for him to come back to him. Being there with Ferus in the last moments of Ferus’s life was difficult because it pained him seeing Ferus die, but the selfish part of him was happy to finally have him by his side again. Ferus began to stir after a few minutes, much to Roan’s relief and pleasure. When Ferus opened his eyes, he looked into Roan’s warm loving green eyes, a smile appearing on his handsome young face.

“Roan…I saw and heard you with me as I was dying,” Ferus whispered, reaching out to cup Roan’s cheek.

“Do you think I would let you die alone,” Roan asked softly, tears filling his eyes.

“I guess not,” Ferus responded softly. “I missed you so much. I’m so happy I can be with you again that I don’t even care I died…I was so lonely and empty without you.”

“I know babe,” Roan responded softly as he caressed Ferus’s cheek. “I know. I may not have been with you physically, but I was always with you.”

Ferus smiled at him. “I know. Gosh I missed you so much. When you died, it was like a piece of my heart was ripped from my chest. I never stopped blaming myself either.”

“I know that too,” Roan told him. “And I wish you wouldn’t give me a big speech about how you should have seen or known about Vader because no you couldn’t have known. Please don’t blame yourself for my death-not anymore.” 

Ferus laughed softly. “You know me too well.” 

“I do and I’m proud of it,” Roan replied with a smile. 

“Is it bad that I don’t care I died because I’m just happy to be with you again,” Ferus asked Roan softly. 

“I don’t know if there is a right or wrong answer to that,” Roan responded with a laugh. “How are you?”

“Happy to be back with my partner…I have a lot of questions and a lot of things I want to talk to you about but…” Ferus’s eyes traveled down Roan’s body.

Roan rolled his eyes fondly. “Always a one track mind with you.” 

Ferus pulled Roan close to him, laughing softly. “Can you blame me? It’s been quite a while.”

“I know. You never moved on,” Roan told him softly. 

“Yeah, well, how does one move on when their soulmate was murdered in front of them out of spite,” Ferus said bitterly. “Besides, I was never going to be interested in anyone else so I didn’t see the point of trying to find anyone. Heck, I never even thought about trying to find anyone else.” 

Roan kissed Ferus’s forehead. “Well, we’re together again and that’s all that matters.”

“True,” Ferus responded with a smile. They took their time as they made love, whispering sweet words to each other as they did so. Roan held Ferus close as they cuddled afterwards.

“I am happy you’re finally here my love. I’ve waited so long to have you in my arms again.” Roan said kissing the top of Ferus’s head.

“So you’ve just been here in the afterlife waiting for me to die,” Ferus asked, teasing his lover.

“It’s not like I wanted you to die, but I did miss you terribly and I’m not unhappy you’re here. However, I have kept myself busy while waiting for you,” Roan informed him. “I’ve made quite a home for us while waiting for you.” 

For the first time since he arrived, Ferus looked around the room he was in. “Wow.”

“I’ll give you the tour later,” Roan said kissing Ferus once more. “I love you. How are you feeling?”

“I’m really great after getting to be with you again,” Ferus said laughing. Roan chuckled as Ferus kissed him again. “Seriously Roan, it is. I’m relieved that I don’t have to worry about the stupid empire anymore either. I can just be with you.” 

“True. Oh, that reminds me, I have a question for you Fer.”

“Ask me anything,” Ferus said with a grin. “And then get back to kissing me because your kisses are the best and I’ve gone too long without them.”

“Will you marry me,” Roan asked, startling Ferus.

“What,” Ferus asked shocked. “We’re already married.” 

“Till death do us part,” Roan told him. “Technically our marriage ended when I died, although I always still referred to you as my husband. I’m just using the technicality to have an excuse to marry you again. And because it gives me a chance to propose to you this time.” 

Ferus laughed and kissed Roan. “I love you and would love to marry you again.”

“Good. I think this time we might get to have a bigger wedding and with more people you know. There are a lot of people here who want to see you babe. When you’re up for it. I just needed to be the one to help you here and help you get adjusted.” 

“I am glad you did. I wouldn’t have wanted anyone else with me during my final moments,” Ferus said softly. “Who all are you talking about?”

“You’ll see,” Roan teased. “But I think you’ll be thrilled to see them all.”

“I would love to see people, but I just want to have some time with you a while,” Ferus told him softly. “I missed you a lot. That’s not to say I didn’t miss anyone else, but I didn’t have a relationship with anyone else the way I did with you.” 

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” Roan told him. “I know and everyone thought that you would want to spend time with your dashing husband before seeing them anyway so they understand.” 

Ferus laughed. “Aren’t you my fiancé now?”

Roan laughed and pulled Ferus in for a hug. “Either way, I’m yours forever.” 

“This time we don’t have to worry about death dividing us,” Ferus said happily. “Are you sure you want to be stuck with me for eternity?”

Roan looked at Ferus, pretending to consider it. “Actually, now that you mention it…” Roan stopped talking to laugh at the look on Ferus’s face. “I’m kidding. No. I’m positive I don’t want anyone but you. I didn’t wait all this time for you to not have you.” 

Ferus kissed his nose. “Good. I love you.” 

“Love you too my sexy fiancé… So, you said you have a lot of things you want to say. Do you want to tell me some of those things,” Roan asked softly rubbing circles on Ferus’s back.

“Babe, were you ever disappointed in me? I feel like I screwed up so much. I got Garen, Solace and Ry Gaul and all those other people on the asteroid killed.”

“Ferus,” Roan said softly. “Babe, no. That was not your fault. Let me say this now, yes I saw everything and no, you never did anything that disappointed me. Not even you being tempted by the Sith holocron was disappointing to me. You forget, I know you inside and out. You were hurting. You were angry. Understandably so. You have overcome so much in your life and you’ve always chosen the right path in the end.” Roan kissed Ferus firmly hoping to convey how much he loved him through that kiss. 

Ferus sighed. “I don’t know. I can’t help but feel like I screwed up so much.”

“We all make mistakes babe. No one is perfect. You did the best you could under the circumstances you were under. You never disappointed me Fer. I promise. I wouldn’t lie to you, would I?”

“No,” Ferus said grudgingly. “You’ve always been straight with me.”

Roan laughed. “Really Fer?”

Ferus laughed when he realized what he said. “Oh gosh. I meant you’ve always been open and honest with me.”

Roan smiled and kissed him. “Always. I would never be straight with you. I don’t have a straight bone in my body…But, seriously though, I know me saying that isn’t going to change how you feel, but I just thought you need to hear it. You have never disappointed me and you never will. I’ll say it every day if I have to in order for it to get through your stubborn head.” 

Ferus laughed. “Hey!”

Roan laughed. “You can’t even deny that you’re stubborn.”

“Ah, well, I learned from the best,” Ferus teased smiling at Roan. 

“Funny,” Roan told him, receiving a kiss from Ferus.

Ferus sighed as he played with Roan’s hair. “You know, I was so angry about having to watch over Anakin Skywalker’s daughter which sounds bad. I knew she was in good hands with the Organa’s and I didn’t have to be hands on but do you know how hard it was for me to watch over his kid when he killed you? Me and you were supposed to have kids. We were supposed to have a long life together as well, but he took that away from me too. He took everything from me.” 

Roan looked at Ferus with a sad smile. “I know babe. I wanted those things with you too. You would have been a great father.”

“We would have been great fun parents,” Ferus said looking at him sadly.

Roan kissed Ferus softly. “Speaking of which, you did the right thing with Trever. I know what you did was really hard for you to do but because of you, he got to have a family for a while and he didn’t have to remember the trauma of watching me murdered as well as other things.”

“Yeah,” Ferus said with a sigh. “The only thing that sucked when making that choice was knowing he wouldn’t remember you. It's like you died all over again. I would have rather replayed your death in my mind every day, which I did do, than to ever forget about you.”

“He does remember everything now,” Roan said softly.

Ferus’s eyes widened. “He’s dead?”

“Yeah, he, Astri and Clive all are. We’ve talked a lot about you and how proud of you we all are.”

“I didn’t know that,” Ferus sighed. “I wish he had lived a longer and happier life.” 

“He told me to tell you that you stink like a bantha,” Roan chuckled. “I strongly disagree with him but that’s just me.”

Ferus smiled fondly at his partner. “I love you.” 

“I’ve always got your back babe.” 

Ferus kissed Roan all over. “You have since the day we met.”

“Though you were just a weird guy who had a hard time choosing something to eat,” Roan teased.

Ferus laughed and kissed Roan. “Well, you married that weird guy.” 

“I don’t regret that because that guy brought so much happiness and love to my life,” Roan told Ferus giving him a soft kiss. “I am so happy that you were there with me in my last moments…I know my mom told you that she was glad that you were too.”

“Your mom is here,” Ferus asked sadly.

“And my dad. They can’t wait to see you too. We talked about you a lot. They said that you didn’t show how upset you were and that made them worried.”

“Yeah, well, I couldn’t let anyone see how upset I truly was. I had so much to do and if I had broken down and lost it like I wanted to and felt like doing, I would have been here with you much sooner,” Ferus said quietly, turning away from Roan to stare at the wall, tears falling down his face. 

Roan pulled Ferus close to him. “I love you Fer. I’m sorry I left you sooner than I would have liked.”

Ferus sniffed. “I know but you didn’t leave me. You were taken away from me.”

“Well its not going to happen again,” Roan promised.

“I know that too. I’m sorry. I’m such a mess.” 

“Oh Fer, don’t apologize. You’ve had a rough several hours. You died. You got engaged to your dead husband. You and I talked about things.”

Ferus laughed and turned back around to face Roan. “Yeah. Just a few small things.”

Roan smiled and kissed Ferus’s forehead. “You’re handling this better than I did. Of course I didn’t have a sexy guy to help ease my transition into the afterlife.”

“Yeah…How did you handle things,” Ferus asked with a frown. 

“My sister was here to help ease things for me as well as my grandparents and my favorite aunt, and while I was grateful and happy to see them again, I missed you…I know we keep saying that to each other, but it’s true.”

Ferus sighed and wrapped his arms around Roan. He had been so focused on his loneliness that he didn’t think about how lonely Roan was without him. “Oh babe. I wish I could have been here with you.”

“No, it’s fine. It was my time unfortunately. I got to watch out for you and see all the good you did in the galaxy and you did so much good. I know you don’t think that but it’s true. I don’t lie to you,” Roan said as Ferus covered him with kisses again.

“Well, we’re going to be together forever now so that’s good,” Ferus said smiling at Roan.

“It is.”


End file.
